Mental Readiness Exercise

(I have a female partner)

1 – Set aside a minimum of 10 minutes each morning to do this exercise. You will need to have the Recalibration Protocol readily accessible for this exercise.

2 – Begin each practice session by reminding yourself that today, your partner may say or do something that you might not like or agree with today.

3 – Given what you know about the upcoming day, picture a hypothetical scenario involving a real topic that your partner might get upset with you about or that you might get upset with her about.

4 – Picture the thing(s) that your partner might say or do that would be frustrating or annoying.

5 – Remind yourself….

    • if this happens, although it will be frustrating, she’s not the only one who does frustrating things in your relationship.  You do your share, too.
    • your typical reactions to your partner’s frustrating behavior have been just as dysfunctional as her frustrating behavior
    • if you expect her to change, you can’t continue to react the same old dysfunctional way yourself.
    • if you can react effectively, the odds are good that she won’t act this way as often in the future.
    • if you had been able to consistently react more effectively in the past, chances are that she wouldn’t still be acting this way now.

6 – Think of any additional self-reminders that might work for you.

7 – As you visualize your partner saying annoying or frustrating things, picture yourself doing one of the following:

A – Letting your partner know that you need to take a break.

        • Then picturing yourself in the hypothetical scenario, going to a place where you can be alone, reading and following each of the steps of the Recalibration Protocol (Also read the steps right now as you are picturing yourself in the hypothetical scenario).

B – Reacting more effectively than you often have done on the past…

        • saying things to yourself that will help you feel calmer, more patient, and able to hear your partner out without interrupting or disputing her points.
        • relaxing your body and slowing your breathing until you feel okay, even though you don’t like the way things have been going.
        • saying the kind of things that are suggested in the Recalibration Protocol.